One Step Forward
by Baiedemachere
Summary: A short conversation in the hospital (after the season 10 finale).


Mulder wakes up feeling numb. His head is heavy and he feels as if he hasn't moved his body for a while. He looks around taking in his surroundings. He is in a hospital. In a very quiet hospital. He turns his head and his eyes fall upon Scully sitting next to his bed, sleeping in a very uncomfortable position. She must have been here for quite a while. He can't help staring at her. The last time he woke up in the same room with Scully was nearly two years ago. She is still beautiful. She has always been beautiful. His beautiful Scully.

Just as if she has felt his eyes on her, Scully wakes up and when she realizes that he has finally come out of a 2-week long coma she rushes to his side.

A sigh of relief escapes her mouth and she is smiling as if she's just heard the best news of her life.

"Mulder!" - she strokes his face gently.

"I missed this. " - he whispers, still weak from not moving and talking for weeks.

"You know how to live, Mulder..." - she chuckles humorlessly.

"No..." - he corrects. "I missed seeing you first when I open my eyes."

She presses her lips together trying to keep her emotions at bay. She doesn't know how to respond to that. His confession is heart breaking.

"You were very lucky, Mulder. Millions couldn't make it."

"Millions?"

Scully can only nod. And she didn't even tell the whole truth. 2.5 billion people died in the plague.

"What about Miller?" - Mulder askes. The last thing he remembers is that Miller came for him and they were stuck in a traffic jam. Miller didn't look very good. But again, neither did he.

" He's still in coma. ... And Skinner."

This is still incredible. She doesn't even know if her brothers and their families have made it. It is a miracle in itself that this hospital is up and running.

"Agent Einstein is fine." - she quickly adds.

"Were they immune?" - he asks, his voice raspy.

"No. The vaccine helped." - she says, her eyes scanning his face, trying to make herself believe that this is happening. That Mulder has woken up.

Mulder nods. He knew something was going to happen, he knew that it would still be in his life. Still... no one ever expects the end of the world for real.

Scully is standing above him. They've been in and out of hospitals time and time again but this one is different. One-third of World's population was killed. It is a lot to take in.

"We'll talk about this later, you need to have some rest." - she brushes her fingers with his and turns to leave.

"Scully... "- he calls after her. "Thanks for saving my life... again."

She turns back and smiles reassuringly.

"Always".

She is about to leave again when he speaks.

"I'm lucky that you still care that much." - he says much to himself rather than to Scully.

His expression changes. She can't interpret it. What is he implying? They are still friends, aren't they? Of course, she cares.

"Mulder..." - she tries, but she is too taken aback by this remark to find words to continue.

This isn't right. She takes two steps forward, then moves to the side of his bed again and touches his hand to make him look at her.

"Mulder, I have never stopped to care." - she whispers. She can't find her voice. She is fighting her tears. "Mulder. I thought we were clear on that."

"You moved out. That much is clear". - he is bitter now. Why is he acting like this? He's such an ungrateful bastard. He is mentally chastising himself. He should be happy to be alive. But for some reason all he can think of is the emptiness he feels laying in a hospital bed knowing the millions of people died and he couldn't do anything to stop it. He couldn't find his son, he couldn't keep Scully by his side. Everything he touches breaks. It makes no difference whether he is dead or alive. He feels empty. This is the same emptiness he felt when she packed and left.

"I didn't leave because I stopped having feelings for your, Mulder, you know that." - she arches her eyebrows. That was supposed to be a confirmation but it came out as a question. She is begging him to understand.

"I must have missed the message."

She sighs. They spent two years in complete misunderstanding. No wonder he didn't return her calls until they were re-assigned to the X-files.

"I left because I couldn't help you anymore and seeing you like that was killing me." - she is still whispering, tears forming in the corner of her eyes.

"I am taking medications and I'm seeing a therapist twice a week."- he says matter-of-factly.

"I know." - she scans his face again.

"I know you do... but you still haven't indicated that you'd reconsider coming back." - his face is still unreadable; his voice is stronger than five minutes ago.

"It's not that simple." - she sighs and moves away from him, looking at the ground, waiting to find the answers there.

"Are you seeing someone?"

"Mulder..." - this is very unfair. She doesn't want to argue with him. She just wants him to rest. Besides... no, she tried but just couldn't bring herself to it.

Scully is staring at her shoes, lost in her thoughts, he is staring at her. A minute passes without any of them speaking a word.

"Do you ever think about ... us?" - he asks finally. Now it's his turn to lose his voice. Maybe losing hope, too.

"I try not to. ... " - she's shaking her head still looking at her feet. "Mulder, I am happy that you have taken steps towards getting better." - she looks up. "I'm really happy for you."

"But you're not coming home." - Mulder concludes, looking at nowhere in particular.

"No..." - she nods. After a couple of seconds, she adds "...at least, not yet."

"So, there's still some chance?" - he looks at her for confirmation, eager to find some kind of reassurance.

"Mulder, we'll talk about this. " - She moves to his side again, leans in and touches his cheek gently. "But first, you'll need to get better. Get some sleep."

"Scully... I need to know." - he's pleading with her.

She smiles, leans in further and kisses his lips softly. Then she lifts her head slightly, looking at him lovingly.

"Get some rest. " - she says then turns and leaves.

Mulder is looking intently at the door she just closed behind her. There's definitely something to hold on to.


End file.
